by Toni Morrison
“She is a friend of mind. She gather me, man. The pieces I am, she gather them and give them back to me in all the right order. It's good, you know, when you got a woman who is a friend of your mind.”
Don't you just love those book passages that ooze into our spirits like molasses?...sticky and all encompassing; not a crevice or crack ignored. Toni Morrison's idea of a friend seeped into my cracks and warmed my spirit up with some kind of sweetness.
I love the idea of a woman who is a friend of your mind...someone who understands your spirit...then learns your spirit and then honors your beloved spirit with honesty and kindness. I can get down with that definition. I'm currently reading two books right now: Mindy Kaling's, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) and an acting book that's supposed to help me learn how to manage myself. (sarcastic doubt) The two couldn't be any more different, but the one thing they do share are definitions of friendship. Everything my eyeballs rest upon today is about friendship. It's a bit spooky how persistent the universe is. She first whispers. If you don't listen then you get a couple of loud shouts. I try not to push her past that. Kaling layed out the rules of friendship which I adored and will now share with you.
The abridged list of Mindy-isms:
- Clothes can be borrowed.
- We sleep in the same bed. I loved this one because it's so true. "How else will we talk until we fall asleep?"
- Be honest about how you look but be gentle.
- I can ditch you, within reason. This one's a hard slap of reality but necessary. She ends with, "In return, I need to talk about you a lot with that guy so he knows how much I love you."
- I will take care of your kid if you die.
- I will nurse you back to help.
- I will keep products at my home for you for when you visit. She discusses pads and contact solution...I would add workout clothes, a shower sponge and wine to this list.
- I will try to like your boyfriend five times. I got lucky. I actually adore my friends' mates, but that wasn't always the case so yeah...gotta stay on the list.
- When I take a shower at your place I won't drop the towel on the floor. Some of these are eerily paralleling the movie Beaches, no?
- If you're depressed, I will be there for you. "I will not abandon you." Not gonna lie. I teared up on that one.
- I will hate and re-like people for you. ONLY true friends will get this lol...and do it wholeheartedly for you.
- No two people are better than us. She ends the chapter on this note.
It was a cute and real list. Toni's is still the one that speaks to me the most, but I laughed the good laugh while reading Mindy's...which is a big fat duh being that she wrote for The Office. She's contractually required to make me laugh.
So yes, the Universe spoke and I listened. I continue to listen...