queen me

twinkie: every time i see a post that involves a beach, it feels like you're picking up a handful of sand and throwing it right in my face. curse you and your beaches! i'm so jealous.

me:  every time you post about your healthy wonderful garden i develop a stomach roll.

twinkie:  ha! my garden isn't healthy. well, every time you mention how warm it is in california a puppy dies and a kitten is born. why tish! why! 

me:  well every time you mention music stuff a bee stings an orphan in the eye!

twinkie: every time you mention another dog besides your god-dog, a baby dolphin drowns and that ugly creature that we both loved from madagascar commits suicide.

me:  WELL every time you mention liking light beer an innocent small child is given a pink sock...urban dictionary that!

twinkie:  please. you know urban dictionary is blocked here. i will just assume that a pink sock is a sock that when put on little children, it turns them fiercely gay. yeah, that's what it is.

me: (sends definition)

twinkie:  oh my holy jesus. now i'm sad. lol.

me:  don't mess with me SISTA!


  1. I'm still traumatized by the knowledge of what "pink sock" is. Thanks for that.

  2. I had no idea...why does there need to be slang for that?! Nevermind, I don't want to know...

  3. lol...ask my perverted and dysfunctional facebook friends.

    they're the ones that gave me that little disgusting factoid.


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