regret

8.10.2010
recently j picked up a killer mentor who told her that going after our dreams shouldn't entail us having to sacrifice everything...

applying that logic, i shouldn't HAVE to give up sleep or comfort to push for something, right? lol

the reason i bring this up is because i was supposed to go to this ku theater & film fundraiser the other night, but i totally forgot about it. the calendar update buzzed 5 minutes before it was supposed to start downtown...i groaned in my chucks and jeans, thinking of the 8 hour day i just had and the 45 minute workout i had had to endure. so i didn't go.

yes, there were probably mad connections there for me, as well as friends in the industry doing the darn thing. i have a couple of friends that work on the casting side. some are directors, some actors...all have fires (bigger than mine) under their butts.

for YEARS i slaved and worshipped everything acting. i gave up relationships and scooted along in the name of film (think jennifer anniston) and now i'm pooped. i'd like to work on my book and when acting comes a'knocking i will kindly answer the door with a smile on my face, no sweat on brow. according to j's mentor if you ask the universe for something it will provide.

paulo coehlo says, "don't let anyone make you feel like you don't deserve what you want." so i'm just gonna go with this thought:

i'm gonna do me and follow a weird little goofy path that fits me. if it gets too weird i'll meander off and try something else, but for now i need a little rest time. my heart is tired from the pulls of passion.

...shortly after finishing this post my agent called. mind you, i have not heard from her for a couple of long months. i have to get new headshots...the groan heard round the world.

i'm gonna do it. discussed it with the guy and we both knocked on wood. maybe all i needed to do was publicly announce my chillness so that the universe would have room to dump some awesomeness my way...

4 comments:

  1. Tish...oh how I love this and coming to a place of peacefulness is so wonderful for you. I bet your headshots will be great too:)
    Love the quote about not allowing someone to make you feel like you don't deserve something

    ReplyDelete
  2. thanks martha :) i'm trying to follow in your footsteps!

    making peace with the now is hard but oh so necessary!

    ReplyDelete
  3. At the end of the day, you should be doing and striving towards what YOU want.
    That being said, I know a couple really good, really well-priced headshot photographers if you're in the market :)
    (Also, the captcha for this is a-list... coincidence?)

    ReplyDelete
  4. love this post. love that you're sitting back and allowing the universe to do it's job. Hard as it is, I know things will happen!

    ReplyDelete

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