Give me some new religion

6.07.2010
you would think i would have gotten the hint by now...



my whole life i've tried different churches and always come away with some freakishly weird horror story that scars me for a couple of years until some new person suckers me into going back. it's a serious conundrum...the way religious folks gravitate to me and try to save the heathen of all heathens...not really (unless you're talking to my mother)


b can totally vouch for me on this one...we can be sitting outside enjoying our day when a dude will come and start flirting...not even 5 minutes in he'll ask if i want to go to church with him. i swear i have "corrupted" stamped on my forehead. i'm the maiden in distress 2010 version.


so yeah...i've had some weird luv triangle issues with dudes i've dated and the Big guy upstairs...once a guy cheated and when we went to his church counseling to discuss he told the preacher he was just on a higher religious level than me so he chose a chick who was on that level...it was delightful watching the preacher verbally bitch slap him for justifying cheating that way.


something's different with the current guy though. i've actually started hitting up a church with him and i dig it. it's this beautiful catholic church in santa monica....pretty music, nice folks that don't make me stand up as they push my forehead back and dance around me (permanently scarred i'm afraid.)



the other day the guy asked if i wanted to go up for a blessing as he ate his cookie and drank his wine stuff...he's asked me before but i've always been too scared of the head push...this time i mustered up some courage and decided it was time to thank the Big one for answering some prayers i had made. i stood in the line, hand on heart like the priest had instructed me and waited as i inched closer and closer. the guy was right behind me...every so often i'd turn around and make sure he was still behind me. he'd giggle and say it would be alright. i got up to the front and the priest looked at me, patted me on the arm and said "you're good silly" or something along those lines...



THAT WAS IT?! all the stressing out was for nothing? i seriously almost peed my pants with glee! no "will you join the church"...no "hey you wanna ditch your dude and grab a drink with me" (that happened once!)

just a simple arm hit and i was g-double-o-d-good. wowzers! high five for saint monica's church! and get this...as i'm giving myself a mental pat on the back i hear a "tish!" and turn to see my dear lovely friends ethel and courtney...they're a darn tootin' cute couple. the guy and i have noticed a lot of strange similarities between us. he's basically court...i'm ethel. (i'm a cute little asian chick!) church double dating...ROCK ON!

basically for the first time i don't want to run out of the church's doors screaming...i wouldn't say i'm a convert...there are still parts of organized religion i still haven't wrapped my head and heart around BUT it's really beautiful to go to a place where i feel a sort of peace and love...a place where they don't look at me weird for not crossing, bending, singing, clapping, or whatever else movements you're supposed to make if you're down with the One who's up.

louis this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship...

2 comments:

  1. "as he ate his cookie and drank his wine stuff"

    Hear that rumbling sound? That's Jesus rolling his eyes at you ;)
    Me on the other hand, I'm laughing hysterically.
    Glad to hear you had a good time getting your sassy self blessed!

    ReplyDelete

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