i just built character

am i ready for someone to stalk my life to death?

...so i'm not really too sure how much detail i can give about the actual talk i had with the producers so bare with me... what i write in this blog is what i can tell lol.

i can say that i started getting more and more nervous as i got closer to my appointment time. i entered into this quiet office room... one guy sat at the front desk while a tv played last season's show. another girl sat with me and together we talked about our fears and preferences until it was her turn and i was left in the room alone... sniff

the logo for fear factor was right above the tv... i swear that was some jedi mind trickery right there.

 i went in the room and left feeling like they assumed i was this schmuck who expected a king. the more nervous i grew the more i spoke. i went way passed the point of "slow your roll flo" for sure. 

at one point a guy said maybe it's not the guys in la... maybe it's you and something in me curled up and died of shame. it's kind of hard to sit in a room full of strangers and hear something like that...

i don't know why it's different, but writing about dating here on my blog is WAY easier yo. that ish left me butt hurt.

it's over now... i'm safe at home. no more sizing tishy up.

i swear random sticks to my life like hoochies stick to corners. 


  1. What a jerk! I cannot stand that mentality of blaming someone for being single.

    First off, being part of a couple isn't some sort of prize or gift. It takes work just like all relationships. Nor is it something exclusive that belongs to only the most awesome people. I've met many an a-hole who is married while a gem-of-a-person remains single.

    There are many reasons for someone to be single. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you.

    Grrrr. I better settle down.

  2. i agree with you.

    finding 'the one' who doesn't make your ass twitch on a daily basis, who makes ya laugh and feel comfortable in your own skin is pure luck man...

    after i ate half a bag of hershey kisses with pretzels i realized this

  3. Tish, just so u know, that's a tactic they use to get a reaction out of you. When I was on the audition circuit, they would say the same thing to me. They say that to rile u up and then size up your reaction. Don't feel bad, honey. It's all part of the game, much like dating itself.

  4. WOW. I'm shocked he said that.. but maybe he was playing a "bad cop" role. Regardless it seemed to force introspection and I find it refreshing that you didn't instantly agree with him and instead took the time to think about it and know you should be insulted because it's totally not you.... I've found at my age (I'm 25) not many guys are ready to commit and I'm rare in knowing that while the chase is fun, it's not what I want.

    Like when I told my dudes I was getting engaged they all said I was crazy except one. It shows a lack of maturity for the age group and a lot of the guys need to just catch up to where you are.

  5. F that S! I agree that they likely said it just to gauge your reaction and/or get a rise out of you. It's still a jerky thing to say though. I hate that to so many people the idea that one is single means they're broken in some way.


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