the easy silence

11.03.2009
Easy silence that you make for me
It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

don't you hate it when you luv a song and then that ish flips on you like a terd-a-licious demon? i mean i've always loved the idea of someone creating a silent calm for me. just sounds sweet coming from the mouth of a dixie chick BUT it ain't so sweet when you're forced into silence cuz you're upset and you don't know how much the truth will help or hurt.

sometimes i spill out every kind of truth i have while other times i'm oddly vague--leaving ya'll to wonder what kind of devil's lettuce i've been smoking before dinner. this will be one of those devil lettuce moments and i apologize.

lol i can't quite verbalize what's causing my not-so-easy silence but i can tell you this...it drives me batty to NOT be able to express myself.
therefore i broke the silence with b yesterday evening. she rocked my world by plopping her little self down in my cardio weight class and joining my routine.

have YOU ever had a friend volunteer to sweat it out with you in a class obviously designed to make your muscles scream uncle like the kid from christmas story screamed it? that's luv my friends...she took the class with me--shooting me "u make my arse twitch, trick!" looks. so worth it though.


afterwards we drove over to jamba and talked about life for a good 4 hours. breaking the silence felt so good. i don't know if i came up for air once. we caught up on insecurites, cultural realizations that make my life a pickle of joy, boyfriend giddiness (that be her giddiness) holiday plans and of course jamba goodness.

i shoved silence in my pocket and potty mouthed everything deep down until
finally my darling friend could see me again.

have you ever noticed what silence can do to two people? it distracts you ...it hides realness...it hides you and the other person...you focus on what's not being said and forget to see the person right in front of you. some people can go their whole lives living in a silent invisible cage. sounds dreamy, right?

this is a completely different kind of "shhh!" than the easy stuff i dig hearing about in that above song. (for realz!) there's just something necessary about honest talks and something unnerving about zipping my lips when it comes to the important stuff in life. thanks b for letting me unleash the beast.


silence may be golden, but i'm used to being broke. bring on the truth!

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