grey gardens are looking a bit kiwi

back in march 2008 drew barrymore did an article in vogue about an upcoming film she had just wrapped on called "grey gardens". i eagerly anticipated the release of the film...her article was just so captivating. drew had completely locked herself inside the world of edie beale--this dynamic & tragic woman. i just couldn't wait to see what the heck she had done and if her sanity sacrifices had been worth it.

they totally were.

hbo is currently running the movie so catch it if you can. this post isn't about the flick though...i apologize but i gotta get the heebie jeebies out. i saw a lot of myself in edie beale...and it scared the crap out of me. she had this insatiable appetite to make it in the world of acting. she gave up love affairs because she feared husbands wouldn't allow her to pursue her dream. she basically gave up on any and all life opportunities for a sane comfortable life in the hopes that maybe some day she'd make it big.

i wonder how big dreams are supposed to get...if it's possible for a dream to suffocate and push out the good things that are right in front of us? right in front of me?

an ex sent me a text a bit ago. just three simple words "i love you" and the only thing i could think of was "this dude will get in the way of acting" and i got uber angry..and then a bit freaked. i wonder how many guys i've pushed away or abandoned...i don't really wanna count. sigh...

oh sane friends. someone out there PLEASE tell me if i start to turn into an edie. cuz seriously the broad was a little spooky at the end and i don't know if i can be down with spooky.


  1. You're a long way from spooky, my dear! :)

  2. So far, so good. I'll give ya a head's up, kay? :)

  3. k! i'm counting on both of you to act as my spooky alerts

  4. you're not insane, just smart! trust your instincts. even if you're pushing them away for acting, there probably is more of an underlying reason. Now I wanna see this movie!

  5. it's actually really fascinating...check it out!

  6. Have you seen the documentary by the amazing Maysles brothers that sparked the film? It is amazing and bizarre and a bit exploitative (I mean, Little Edie clearly has a mental illness), but, wow, what a worldview these women had. And Edie's style is phenomenal--if the towel was the color she wanted that day for her headscarf, then a towel it was... or a sweater...


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