1 of many god years

"Every woman is every other woman trying to figure out who she is."-Nana Korantemaa.

it seems like such a simple task...learning who you are. you'd think you could just sit down with yourself for a couple of hours and then, like magic you have a a total"voila/eureka!" moment. you suddenly know exactly who and what to present to the world but alas it ain't that way...

if it were, oprah would be out of business cuz i swear she dedicates at least one show a week to schoolin' the public on how you never really figure it out until you're 50, fabulous and a billionaire. go figure.

maybe it's like "god years" or something...1 day of learning who you are is the equivalent of 5 years or what not. maybe i'm merely 5 years old in the world of 'knowing who you are". lol...it now makes perfect sense.

this week i'm not much for action and that bothers me a bit so i made sure to get on the internet last night and order some new headshots. today i made sure to become a member of a los angeles group out here called "women in film". it cost a pretty penny and i might be out of my league a bit but the web site said it's for mentoring too so hey...why not go sit amongst the chanel-privileged and mingle...plop some pleasant inexperienced tishy in front of professional genius...who knows.

i do admit that i have to get back into classes again. that's the next charge after i pay off the membership and head shots : )

i don't know how else to write that i'm lost, walking around blindly out here. why didn't langston write about this? i mean i understand the whole "dream deferred" nightmare...i went after my dream. i moved to la. no regrets. now where in the poem does it mention a dream missed due to industry ignorance?

small tiny baby iddy biddy steps at a time i guess.

don't eat carbs...take some classes...find a casting couch and lay down! (just kidding!)...and most importantly, hope that gram, best friends and mom are right...that a day will come where all of this hard stuff that's severely kicking my arse can be looked at as worth it.


  1. That's good steps to get you in the game. And I like the idea of God years...kind of like dog years (lol), but waaay more philosophical.

  2. harpo has her biases lol
    have a gr8 weekend folk


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