emotionally paralyzed

maybe i was a bit more intimidated by that class than i realized. i got into work this morning and sat in front of my computer almost paralyzed...i was just having a really hard time fitting what the new class means into my brain. i tried to download the script that i'm supposed to perform and it wouldn't work, the book i needed to get was bouncing around in my brain...basically i had so much worry and freak out whackness going thru my head i couldn't move or think.

luckily something rational kicked in and i suddenly remembered that i'm paying for the darn class and i control what i do and when i do it...(funny i could forget such an important thing.) i wrote the acting workshop and told the folks that i knew i wasn't quite ready yet for an advanced class...heck i watched the tv show 'the game' after work and saw one of the girls in the advanced class!!! they use an acting technique i'm not too familiar with...a lot of famous folks use it....brad pitt, halle, charlize theron...it's a bit much for me right now. i love acting and i approach it like a school kid. i want to start with the basics and work my way up...pride has no place. i want this class to challenge and provoke...but in a manageable way.

so now i'm just waiting for the acting coach to call me back and verify that it's cool. then i can be 100% at peace.

it's crazy how easily it is for the world to determine my demeanor...i must really work on that!


  1. That's right. You're the boss lady when it comes to your life. :)


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