sing it ms simone

3.01.2008
march first...




yesterday's blog was so weird for me to write. i felt like i had to put something down...to get out the crap jumping around in my noggin but i never got to a point...never figured out exactly what i was trying to settle in my brain.



this morning i woke up and figured that mess out. i've been so lost lately. i wrote this incredibly long journal entry today and started listing the qualities i want to keep about myself that either i or important people in my life have defined as belonging to me and one, (my empathy), kind of hit a nerve. i have been so caught up in "why is everyone doing this to me? why is this happening to me" that i kinda forgot that everything's not about me...that doesn't necessarily mean i'm gonna put up with the crap people dish at me...it means i can't remember the last time i really listened to someone else and truly understand what's going on in their world...i've become self-absorbed in unhealthy ways. for instance if a guy doesn't call when i want him to i question how he could do that to me...when in all actuality the dude is living his life lol. or a friend gets busy with life and doesn't call for awhile...i take it as a personal attack...these kind of mental deductions are self absorbed like a mutha! it's ok to really focus on the you and all...it's just when you make everyone else revolve around you that you run into dead ends...or late night leap year blogs that make no gosh darn sense. it's crazy but luckily once you look in the mirror and see the person you've become, you can see the things you always have the power to change as well. i'm ready to go



march is my birthday month...i tend to celebrate the whole dang time. it's the best recharge/jump start for the new year and more than ever it's time to celebrate and set up the year to come.



in the words of the great nina simone, "it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life...and i'm feeling good".

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