push it good

1.20.2008
so today was a nasty narly shooting venom angry at the world kind of day. i just wasn't feelin' the lonely look...wasn't good dawg. my girl j texted me and i just started shooting off at the mouth talking about how i'm the default life in other people's lives...when they're not busy when they're bored, blah blah blah they call me up and i'm sick of it cuz most folks nowadays have fams and boyfriends and i'm left twiddling my thumbs and i was tired...sorry j. you're my best friend so it's either i talk and vent or shut myself up into a tishy conundrum of nasty and you never hear from me at all.




so i went on a hike even though i was stood up by a coworker (grrr) and then i couldn't decide if i really wanted to go to this ku watch party alone but i did just because i knew i needed to get out of the apt and it was the best decision i could have made. the game was fantastic (we won of course) but i was still in my tishy little shell, chillin with my beer and nachos (oh yes i'm a classy broad). after the game ended a couple of people that i've seen around (remember from college but never hung with) started buzzin about going to this other bar down off of santa monica blvd and they were pressuring me to come. my girl looked me straight in the eye and told me i had to just push myself to be out...just push it real good (salt n' pepa song's stuck in your head huh?) so i said what the heck and went and i had the BEST time. we ended up at barney's beanery. there was the birthday boy lyle (i gave him the nickname lovett--original right?) he's this really cute dreamy typical kansas cutie, tall dark hair and blue eyes, my girl maria who organizes all the ku events, my favorite gay couple in the world, ethel (my new token asian gal pal) & her partner courtney, (favorite quote of the night, "I'M GAY") and some of the birthday boy's buds. turns out almost everyone at the table is in the industry some how...there was even this chick who does fashion pr who i remember double dated with me and this guy i dated a million years ago my freshwoman year of college (marlon, j lol...hee hee). one person was a personal asssistant (works with scrubs--small world), a tv sitcom director, some commercial casting agents...it was nice ;) ku connections...that's what i'm talking about.



we seriously sat around for hours talking about bigotry and racism, fav films for the year, tom cruise and his crazy cult, chinese number puzzles lol...don't ask me to remember the name of this ish among other things...just one of those great nights that could have never happened if i would have stayed home and pouted about being alone in the world. sometimes i guess i do need a push. the funny thing is once i got out my phone started blowing up...friends callin' out the wazoo and even my little youngin' big d started playing the cute phone text game (the boy is just too dreamy to let go!)



a good laugh with folks that aren't obsessed with verbiage like "we and us" was just what this gal needed. i'm sorry my lovely friends in great and loving relationships if you think i'm a witch...i still love you...i just need specific doses of you when i'm going thru this particular stage of singlehood known as the one year realization. : )



at least i'm honest! who wants a pollyanna "being single is swell" friend...ugh. that's just lame. i'm keepin' it real...and pushin it....pushin' it real good

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