elton john temper tantrums

1.08.2008
please friends no that i am thankful you've stuck around thru my pouting and unGodly temper tantrums. seriously i feel like i should be singing that you lived your life like a candle in the wind or something because i have been shooting venom since sunday. (basically i've been behaving like a spoiled divo, aka elton john--the king of temper tantrums) lol




i can honestly say this has been the lowest i've ever sunk in regards to my take on my budding acting career. i've never cursed it as much as i have this week. i've never lashed out at my friends for helping me keep the dream alive (sorry i'm still in a cheesy elton mood). i guess it was inevitable i'd hit rock bottom and lose major hope. (funeral for a friend) i mean i've been sad and disappointed many a time but i've never questioned whether or not i should keep going. (goodbye yellow brick road) i seriously sat at my desk and asked myself what else i could try instead. i came up with nothing which lets me know this dream ain't quite done with me...i guess that's acceptable being it hasn't really begun so to speak. (don't let the sun go down on me)



i've just asked that my darling friends give me a couple of days to figure things out. i mean ya gotta cut me some slack. when i have a set back i have me and me alone to go home to and discuss...when push comes to shove, physically i gots no one in the corner (no valentines) so when my spirit is down and out it's extra hard to perk myself up. i come around...i always come around but hollywood is infamous for being a hot cookie to hold on to...these days are bound to happen. (it ain't gonna be easy)



today my character was questioned. someone thought i wasn't thankful for the acting favors they had set up for me and i wasn't in the best of places, mentally, to receive the accusations humbly. all this elton ranting just to say that this is hard and i'll have my days, i come with good intentions and when i'm strong i'm very cognizant of making sure my words match up with my actions. is it acceptable to apologize for future bad behavior? does that kind of defeat the purpose?



i know not but i have a feeling elton does it and gets away with it...that's my song and i'm stickin to it. i hope you don't mind...i hope you don't mind...

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