butt twitchings

1.09.2008
I love to say my butt twitches. There are some phrases in the English language that are great conversation starters. I thank meg ryan and kevin kline for that particular phrase. I can attribute some of my quirkiness to them no doubt.


With that background out of the way I would like to list some things that make my butt twitch…just for kicks and giggles.

talk of butt worms. Yesterday my best bud j told me about an episode of oprah she had watched. The topic was this nasty little worm that supposedly you can pick up from being barefoot. The worm crawls in between your toes, then crawls into your butt when you sleep at night…then it comes out of your hole and lays its eggs. If you are ever curious and want to know if you indeed have these lovely little worms you're supposed to put tape over your hole and if there are little eggs on it in the morning you're a nasty s.o.b. lol…how incredibly horrific is that?! are you kidding me? there are many gross things I can handle but that definitely goes down as butt twitchable.

the fact that ellen from the ryan seacrest radio show I listen to while brushing my teeth in the mornings could not pronounce barack obama's name correctly. Um…his name was a popular topic a while back and since he's now one of the big dogs running for a little thing called the presidency I just assume folks in the media no less should be able to avoid silly guffaws like "bear-ick" obama. Sigh…butt twitch!

folks that approach me about what I should be doing with my acting career. If more classes were the golden ticket to acting I'd be there folks. I'll do me. you do you. when I first arrived in la I was waited on by a guy who had trained in Shakespeare at some fancy schmancy school on the east coast…and he was my waiter at BJ's. lets think about that for a minute…sadly it's not what you know in this business…it's who you know. twitch…

I'm still on the worms thing…twitch.

It's not all twitches and scowls but I figured it's always a good idea to purge the negative stuff to make more room for the good. for instance, I've begun to look at the brighter side…I had all those butt twitches and not one worm fell out. that's a positive if I've ever heard one!

(note from the author: twitch 3 relates in no way to any supportive friend that's offered sympathy and/or their positive suggestions. i hope no friends were hurt in the making of this blog...instead i am referring to all the obnoxious folks that already have their SAG cards, have landed great jobs, studied at so and so place but are still at the same acting workshop i'm in huffin & puffin)

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