i didn't remember : (

6.28.2007
so for the most part i had a great day. work wasn't too bad and afterwards i came home and got to play a nice game of scrabble with my buddy d...life's swell right? wrote my daily blog...decide to check my reg email account...my grandmother and i email each other every day so i figured i needed to see what happened in good ole kansas city. just found out that today is my dad's birthday. gram of course didn't mention him. they never really do. my dad had/has a twin, my auntie and gram mentioned that today was her birthday...one child. man...




i'm just a little upset...ok a lot...that i never remember that. i don't know my dad's own birthday...i have memories of him i can count on my hands and fred called so that combination makes for a very bad night...really bad night. june 28th....june 28th tish. god damn it. : (



there are just some circumstances where the tears never dry up.



now i know why my momma sent me a text saying she loved me today. it's funny how well that woman knows me...even before i know myself.



happy birthday daddy...

a wedding speech

my best friend is getting married. a tattoo on my body says it's so.




i'm in awe of this gal. the stress of planning a wedding can take a toll on the best of women but she does it with grace. i'm not much for the weddings (lol) but i seriously can't wait for this event. these are the two most awsome people coming together...which is why i have already started writing the speech for their first toasts lol...the wedding's in october--can ya feel the excitement now? she's far away and so i can't give her hugs when the stressful times come BUT i can call and blog the heck out of that ish : ) it will be beautiful in the end...always is my dear AND when you break it down to the nuts and bolts it's about you and that lovely man waiting for you in that place of windows. the funny thing is she knows this..she's the teacher and rock and the wise go-to-girl but it's nice to know your friends get it too, right?



is this what being a big kid consists of? my friends are getting married and starting new chapters. sigh.. i keep eating my apple jacks, watching my cartoons but gosh darn it my friends are pulling me along with them on the big kid bus.



i've been having a hard time writing lately. i have so much on my mind and nothing up there to mush it together to be any kind of cohesive. i'll just say that my lady friends are making some hard decisions and i'm trying to help as best as i can and offer what weird experience i can bring to the table but more than anything just know that i'm a great hand holder and i'll shut up and listen if that's what you need.

luv ya ladies! luv you j!

so you think you can dance

6.27.2007
if you're not watching "so you think you can dance" then you're seriously sleeping on one of THE most artistic shows out there.




there's just something about watching these people move...they pull you into the tv with their bodies and you're just captivated. don't get me wrong. i love acting and i believe whole heartedly that it's able to engage the audience and evoke passion and emotion but nothing compares to dancing...the artist uses every ounce of their body to tell you their story. it's raw and primal. stuff like that causes me to shut my mouth, lay on my stomach, cross my legs, put my chin in my hands and sigh like a young kid star struck. makes me wanna dance..."like watching water"...man that's some good ish. plus the music is eclectic, mixed and appropriate. i'm gonna be singing "lets get loud" by jennifer lopez...a song that i rocked out to in front of 20,000 people once at a college basketball event. yes, i'm a secret wannabe dancer.



watch it! wednesdays and thursdays on FOX. i want to be hok's flower!!!

zen not zone

so this has been a slow week for me and i'm not referring to time. i don't know where my mind has gone, but it's not chillin in tish land that's for sure.




yesterday i totally left my keys chillin' in my car (maybe i shouldn't be broadcasting this numb nut move but oh well) unlocked. free car just sitting there in my work parking lot...nice. i was thankful i was brainless enough not to lock my door because i would have been S.O.L. but yeah. folks try to have conversations with me and my memory is terrible. i forget things as soon as they're uttered. (i still can't remember the twinky moments adrian) maybe i need more omega 3...something!



i may not be so hot in the cognitive area lately but it's easier to handle knowing i'm about to house sit for someone and relax relax relax. my old boss hit me up and i gladly accepted. the woman is stocking her wine cabinet, fridge and leaving me with plenty of lovely gardening to help me zen...not zone. i'm going to bring some lovely reading material. i'm currently trying to finish up _what's the matter with kansas_ this book that my best bud gave me to read back in december. lol. i can do this...i can read a political nonfiction book. i can. plus she's got amazing flowers, a cool arse wild bunny named bun bun or lola depending on who you talk to in the neighborhood and a dog named fritz who loved on my leg once (i think it's serious). i'm gonna take mad pictures!



i love my random life. the boss lady was telling her husband that she was proud of me because of my photo shoot i just did. more shoots could possibly come from this past one and if so then i'll be really proud of myself too. i'm ready to work this life of mine yo! i sat in a 2.5 hour meeting today and wrote a poem about acting and my dream. (glad i'm getting paid to write) of course because it's national brain fart week i left it at work but i'll post it tomorrow.



so yeah, this week has been really chill...i saw oceans 13 with kenny and i'm playing some scrabble tomorrow with d. life's just good.

crushin'

6.21.2007
there's nothing better than getting lost in a conversation with someone...


laughing so hard your stomach muscles hurt

and basking in the butterflies flittering around inside

what a difference a min makes

6.19.2007
I woke up this morning before my alarm and decided I wouldn't snooze…




It's a well known fact in la that traffic can change in a matter of minutes…5 minutes later and you're bumper to bumper for a good hour. 5 minutes sooner and it's smooth sailing…strange phenomenon. I felt like the whole universe was different today because of my early morning jolt. Usually every morning I pull out of my garage and see the same familiar commuters and students on their way but I got a whole new set today including a boy who couldn't have been older than 10 wearing a grown man's suit walking down the sidewalk chillin like this was the most normal thing one could possibly do at 7:20 a.m.



i love my neighborhood.





end of day: i just got back from an impromptu dinner with my good friend mateo. i don't know if you remember him...it's been awhile since i've blogged about him but he's my guy buddy from work that i used to be joined at the hip to.





i didn't realize how much i missed him.





when my ex broke my heart in two i couldn't tell mateo...he took me out for lunch one day and i just broke down and cried and i was so ashamed...he told me that day that he was upset with me, not for crying but for not considering him as a friend to confide in. i never kept anything from him again.





he's that kind of friend that seriously keeps it real and tells you the utmost right thing to do...hardcore tough love. it's a blessing and a curse : ) i sat in the car with him today as he was coo-ing with his girlfriend of 11/12 years (yes....strictly platonic, no alterior motives-kinda bud) and i was so happy to listen in....they speak to each other like it's their first year of dating. respect and devotion abound...makes it a LOT easier to embrace his words that's for sure.





he's here for only this week...a week that hopefully will take it's time and chill out for once. i need rocks from time to time. lol...





today was a good day.

passion

6.17.2007
i love my sunday mornings. they've always been my day where i can do what i need to do, just me...reflecting and hanging out--enjoying life ya know? like everything, they've still been able to evolve over the years. lately i've been waking up kinda early and going to get coffee with my girl bree. we talk shop...discuss our past week, yadda yadda.




today we had some interesting conversation. i brought up the fact that my film i watched of myself (shot two years ago) sucked the big one and how i was ashamed that i couldn't rise above the writing and so forth to have a good performance. (basically no one will ever see that film lol) that's when bree brought up the fact that she can't direct something she doesn't love passionately. she's right. you have to love and believe in your art or what's the point...it's just a job.



we left our favorite little coffee shop with some new gumption under our belts...we're out here for the right reasons and while we may be a little lost we're definitely not out of the running. i came home, read some, took a nap and watched my tivo'ed "so you think you can dance". the show totally hit a nerve when one dancer explained why she did it. she said she would watch others dancing and it would make her angry that it wasn't her. i couldn't agree more. you just get this fire up your butt that you could be doing that...lol. it's almost ugly. it's why i sit back and wait for that possible show about being mixed. i swear i'll rock that audition when it comes. sneaky ones may try to work their way in before me but watch out yo. it's my baby and i'm gonna work it! : )



i can't seem to shake this cold i have. nap time again...and some lovely movie watching : ) research baby!

Turn and face the strain

6.15.2007
Changes are my least favorite thing but come they must. A lot of folks in my circle are going thru massive changes…some good, some hard, all challenging but I'm so proud of them. There's something magical about the perspective of a friend. We're able to see into the future and grab on to a certain confidence that everything will be ok for our loved ones. Listen to your friends when they tell you everything will be ok. This isn't an empty forecast…if they're true then they'll do whatever it takes to help you get to that lovely place they foresee.






Our life lessons come and go…we learn, use and sometimes forget 'em but never forget who dishes the majority of them out…our friends.





Unfortunately I'm bony as heck so I can't really call myself 'big momma' but just know dear friends little momma is here for ya with open long arms and I'm in awe of your individual strengths…you inspire me!

finding peace

6.13.2007
i went thru this weird poetry kick a couple of months ago...and for some reason i'd just throw the errant papers in weird places and forget about them. (says a lot about my writing) but anyways. i was cleaning out my work bag and came across this one:




finding yourself in a place where life's how it should be

how you hoped it would be before...

before false love bore false perspective

bore false joy

false hope



peace from emotional lonliness

disappointment...

fear worry and pain



finding peace



it's odd because i wrote this at a sad point in my life but somehow i knew i'd make it thru and be able to blast it to the masses truthfully. so now i can do that today...



so i woke up with some pretty heavy things going thru my head this morning...back in college i took a class on the concentration camps....we'd read book after book, testimony after testimony on how the nazis were able to control that many people...how they could control riots and rebellions...basically cease them all together...similar to the slave/overseer relationships...i know this is exponentionally greater than layoffs at a job in the valley but we folks left at work today had to carry on and pick up the work of those that were let go...knowing that we're next. it's the weirdest feeling. you just try to hang on and hang in for as long as you can. (heavy thoughts for an actual good night of rest)



the other thought i had (thank goodness) was the current mental list i have stored on what it takes to be a mate of mine. i have my fare share of conversations with God as I'm sure most everyone else does...whether they know it or not it pops up from to time...it's probably one of the THE most personal actions we as humans partake in...something we rarely share with anyone else...thus having conversations with God outloud with the one you love has to be one of THE most beautiful acts of love i can imagine. and i'm not talking about praying...people do that all the time together but actually just talking...and allowing the person you love to hear. it's pretty deep...



the reason it came up is because i could NEVER share such personal things with ex's...most of the time i was talking about them...asking if they were the right one for me...thanking God for sending them to me, thanking God for shutting them up for me : ) to trust someone so much that you can stand on your wedding day dancing in your spouse's arms and say outloud, "thank you for sending me this man/woman"



i rarely get so romantic but something's come over me. my best gal pal, j, just finished this book that changed her life and gave her this new sense of spirituality she didn't know existed...she described it over email and i seriously could see her speaking and see her glowing...it was a beautiful thing. i'm tired of messing around with people that aren't serious about what love really is...being with your friends, family, loved ones...



saying, "i'd take a bullet for that guy" is SERIOUSLY not enough..what is that?! lol...i don't get it at all...whatever. i have this image of what my tish mate should be like...he doesn't cheat, he doesn't lie, he doesn't continue to woo me after we've broken up--knowing it's good and over, disrespecting me and intentionally hurting me



this guy is fly...(that means phenomenal ellen and pat!) and he makes me want to banish the nasties i've experienced in my life and focus on being a beautiful human being...the honest sense of the word.



gosh darn you jen and your darn book. i'm going to the library this weekend. i'm picking it up. you've rubbed off on a sista!!!



i'm finding my peace



p.s. tonight i'm watching the first indie professional film i ever acted in. right before i moved out here to la la land i auditioned for and received a cooky part in a small budget film shot in kc called "self help". a girl that acted in it with me recently moved out to los angeles and brought a copy along (apparently the sister girl gets her copy last--debbie downer music) we're going to watch it tonight. i'm nervous...watching myself on film is a funny thing. i get so embarrassed and nervous lol. it should be rockin good times though. i'll let you know how it is :)

i love every day people

6.12.2007
a very likeable lad informed me today that i meet and know random people with amazingly random and entertaining characteristics. lol....maybe so. it's perspective though in my opinion....one man's random traits are another man's borring attributes but it's still a swell thing to know that my friends and aquaintences are at least interesting and entertaining to others outside of my tishy bubble. : )




sigh....people's unique whatevers...i just wrote a poem for the folks at my job that are being let go tomorrow. did i tell you about that? that they're shipping jobs overseas to manila? tomorrow's gonna be a sad sad day. i'm kind of the class clown of my department...infamous for being goofy and crazy--putting smiles on the folks' faces so obviously i can't disappoint them by turning into a blubber butt. i thought about each person's goofy qualities that the rest of us love so much and made sure it rhymed. : ) it will definitely cause some chuckles.



people have to know that they leave marks and have special qualities that etch places in others' memories. man...whether i like it or not the people you work with become a sort of pseudo family and so it's sad to see my little tree shrinking...we're losing some good eggs! we all need a little office space humor in our lives...a cooky weirdo with a stapler...the guy that wants us all to just read the memo...

catching a cold in june is weird

6.11.2007
ironically i lay here on my couch watching sex and the city and samantha is sick & crying because she's all alone with no one to take care of her.




lol i always say there are only two times where being single sucks: when you're sick and incapable of moving and when you have ridiculous groceries and are lugging them upstairs to your apartment without help.



the worst of the cold is over. i have actual brain function coming back and sanity has returned as well. thank God! i can only take so much of the poor me syndrome. the great thing about getting sick though is i nurse my little self thru something and then feel like a soldier because i did that ish alone. i've come along way since my freshman year of college...battling the flu and crying to my mom to come and take care of me lol. now if i only lived in a town that had delivery services that will bring anything and everything i'd be set. hey, we all have our limits : )

crucial conjunctions

6.10.2007
ah....how fun is it to feel a million things at once....a bunch of 'ands' and no 'ors'


i had a beautifully full weekend and i'm happy and spent, i'm sick as a dog (i caught a cute little cold) i'm sad....an has left. it went by entirely too fast if you ask me.



her first night here was really cool. i was probably the happiest i've been in a really long time...seeing people watch two girls who look nothing alike on the outside laugh the same, play the same...it's cool to have family around...i've been lonely for family--more than i ever knew before she came. the sacrifices i've made...i don't think i really processed all of that when i pushed myself to move out here to los angeles. don't get it twisted....moving back isn't in the forecast but convincing a sis to move out here might be in the cards. : )



we watched movies, laughed, ate sushi and mexicano food, visited with friends and hung at the beach. i loved seeing that kid mingling and laughing with my new friends and enjoying herself...meeting new people that are doing the darn thing and loving life. every youngin' needs some beautiful women to inspire her into action!



aight..the cold is beating me down. it's time to watch some chicken soup flicks and call it a weekend. i miss you sis! come back soon!!!



thank you chele and kenny for your takes on my 'situation' and your words...sometimes i need some restored rationality to deal with conjunctions that are cruel right now

anticipation

6.07.2007
i don't know if it's vegas last weekend or the evil one that refuses to leave my life alone but i've been exhausted out of my mind lately. that all changed though when my kid sis called this morning and said her and my mo were eating lunch and would soon board her plane to come and see me.




this is crazy!!! she's never been to los angeles...or california for that matter so this will be her first time seeing the life i've made for myself. how weird is that?! this is the chick i used to drag around my house by the neck when she was a baby. moving away from fam sucks but visits are the bomb yo!



i love this chick...when i say she's brilliant and wonderful and entertaining as heck. once when she was 5 she came into the living room and told my mother and me, "i'm miserable. i had a bad hair day today"....5 people! my mom and i were bustin' a gut! ha! all my friends that i grew up with love her...she's always made us laugh...definitely her own person lol she's going to be a great editor for the new yorker, she's goofy and doesn't take life too seriously. she travels...i heart her.



i have to show her my life...i think we're gonna hit up a movie tonight with b, go to a happy hour tomorrow, visit an art exhibit with my homegirl and grub at my favorite breakfast joint, jinky's. mmmmm and don't forget about coffee with my darling friend bree...now that i have my bookworm mini me with me we'll have plenty of books to gab about.





nice chill weekend...



ok total side note that i must share:



pet peeve #1: the macho man-- so ole boy from vegas reached an interesting plateau yesterday when he called super duper late and referred to me as "the luv of his life"...even half asleep i knew this was a tid bit odd. i remember saying something to him like "um maybe you shouldn't be referring to me as such" but he totally tried to justify it...from what i can recall. so this morning i got up and texted him (cuz i'm cool like that) and said that he was really cool but i really didn't have the energy to invest in something new right now. he wrote back, "yeah i feel the same way. i have a lot on my plate right now that i need to focus on"...everything's cool and done with right? wrong! he texts again a couple of minutes later and says, "this doesn't mean that we should stop talking or anything...see each other when we're in each other's states" followed by another text "i mean i am still the same man you met in vegas"....well i HOPE you're still the same dude since i JUST met you four days ago. lol...then he asks me what car he should buy today-the maserati or the benz...does that really work folks? he just throws out big bad hot rods and i decide shallow is cool and switch up everything i've just said? lol...i laughed and wrote it off as a fun weekend in vegas lol...i luv life! athletes...i tell ya what.



pet peeve #2: malapropisms-- dude. i can't stand it when people use the darn things or try to write out big words and can't even spell them correctly. now i know i can crank out a blog pretty darn quick and i slip up from time to time but using big words just to sound smart....groan. you CAN tell the difference. here's some advice: if you have a sound thought just say it. no one's gonna care whether or not you hit the word size of the day...this ain't scrabble ya'll!!!





that's it...happy friday eve !!!

la cultura

6.05.2007
so i'm sitting here watching the alma awards and i'm totally lovin' it! i've never watched the show before but it's good to see the pride and luv for one's culture burst out....in hollywood no less! i'm not gonna even get into some of the other awards ceremonies...don't get me started! : )




it's a beautiful thang...back in the midwest we used to say if you're brown your down. my brother's people are definitely down. moving to los angeles has definitely been an experience for me. i've always been fascinated by latino culture but moving here and being immersed in it is lovely. weird that a little mixed chick from the midwest grew up worshipping frida kahlo and chicano history lessons? i think not...i had a thang for pangu (look it up!) & amy tan, soul food & the great diaspora too so don't get it twisted. culture period is beautiful ya'll!!!

oh one ku shout out...the president of the national council of la raza, janet murguia, worked for ku as the executive vice chancellor while i was a student there. she came to my journalism class and spoke to us about making something of herself and going after her dreams...using her journalism degree to get her there.... oh yeah baby!!! it was cool to see her on the show tonight.



p.s. sheila e is my shero

luck

so i was talking to my mom today...dreading going to the doctor. yes i'm a grown arse woman and YES i'm still not comfortable with dudes giving me breast exams among other things when she said something that rocked me to my core.




i don't talk about it a lot because it scared the living $@!!# out of me but a couple of years ago my doctors found cervical cancer and i swear my whole world turned upside down.



today my mom had reminded me that i had had a male doctor...the doctor that told me the cancer was gone. then she told me she loved that doctor and will always remember his face....dang mo! heavy stuff for a lazy tuesday afternoon. it was hard to take actually...



i can remember when i found out i had it...i went for a check up and for some odd reason my mom really wanted to go...a couple of docs at my college clinic said they had found some odd stuff and wanted me to get looked at by my home doctor...i wasn't sweatin' it though...college clinics tend to be somewhat incompetent if you've ever dealt with them but along she went...i sat there on the table. my lady doc came in and casually said "well you have cervical cancer so we need to start discussing how we can approach this"...huh? i remember my mom's eyes tearing up and she turned around. hard day....really hard day.



everything obviously is cool now but man there have been some really hard times and i always seem to pull thru. i seriously don't give myself enough credit because i've been thru some doozies. i think my over dramatic tendencies keep me from weighing some of my situations correctly but overall i think i'm a pretty strong sister. today i had a long great conversation with my cyber shrink jr about being strong. she wanted me to make sure i knew she was a strong woman...i never doubted her for a minute. i have a hard time being around weak women actually...i'd say all my close girlfriends are pretty darn inspiring. i told her we all tend to gravitate towards others like us...(well unless they're BOGUS and put up a facade)



so yeah...i'm lucky. i've been thru some hard times and i've come thru with a couple of bumps and bruises but basically unscathed. some days we all just need to give ourselves and our loved ones around us more credit--credit for their unshakeable moments of strength when it counts the most.



j is a shero of mine...went thru TWO heart surgeries, has gone after every one of her passions...kicks arse at the gym, (b i won't count the time you almost passed out cuz there was a mutant bug in your bathroom air vent)

we'll stick with the fact that you're an amazing mother and so is my twin big T...that e decided things were whack and flipped the script on her life...got a new job...found her very own peace and happiness, cyber shrink jr knows exactly why i think she's the bomb--at least she better know! self respect and acknowledging one's self worth is a beautiful thang! my play sis up north who has been thru probably every thing mentioned above and come out fly as ever and my mo who had the ability to pull herself together and get herself and her daughter thru the hard times including cancer.



i'm just lucky i guess. these are the women i call friends. luck is a beautiful thang.

p.s. the doctor's appointment was fine. all that worrying for nothing : )

conks: the comeback

6.04.2007
So I nonchalantly mentioned in my last blog that I met someone in vegas ville. Mind you I am aware that "what happens in vegas stays in vegas" but this big guy is being pretty darn persistent that I get to know him. At one point in the night he made all of us girls come up with our own toasts before shooting down our tequila. For his own toast he said something along the lines of " here's to finding out what love really is…blah blah blah" I can't remember the rest (we were doing shots remember!) but yeah…even in my buzzed state I knew this was a little out there for a guy to say an hour into just meeting a gal.






That little scenario popped back up in my head today after reading an article on salon.com. the basic gist of the article is about this girl who questions why her boyfriend can't say I love you yet. The columnist writes:





"But consider this also. If he were willing to say "I love you" and say it often, it might also indicate something dark and treacherous: that he knows the power of romantic speech, of the capacity of words to excite feelings, to reassure, to cradle and caress, to kindle warmth where there is no actual warmth or enduring intent. You might be glad that if he actually does feel no enduring commitment to you, at least he's not using those words to give you a false sense of security, only to break up with you later."





Man! The man's a genius!!!…the power of romantic speech…I think lots of people out there believe they have this power. I get pretty nauseated when I hear lovey dovey stuff so most of the time I'm pretty immune to such things (like in the bar for instance). Humans are quick to try to weaken the power of a word…if some new adjective comes out to describe something cool it's pounced on and used until every last ounce of anything is squeezed out of it…or even something not as shallow: sometimes words are used a lot to lesson their power intentionally but yes…used and abused nonetheless. People and their romantic lines do just the same.





...Creates skeptical folks and that's no fun. I'm going to try to be nice to aforementioned person and give him the benefit of the doubt BUT I will have to tell him I get a tad bit insulted by people's hopes to woo someone based off of telling them what you THINK they want to hear. Lol…never assume cuz the only thing I want to hear right now is "Tish you have a lunch date with Spielberg on Tuesday to discuss his new project he thinks you'll be perfect for"…now THAT'S some talk i can stomach!!!



on to different news somewhat related to dating: my girlie b and i were lunching today when we saw a couple walk by...the guy was totally surfer hottie boy and she was (as nice as i can be) this total stereotypical 'ghetto bird' type with a conk!!! both of our mouths dropped. it was THE most interestingly diverse couple i had ever witnessed...and apparently b too because we giggled for a good half hour over the matter. really? conks and surfer boards work nowadays? soulmates really don't have to be a darn thing like us huh? (for all of you that have no clue what a conk is think of al sharpton hee hee) it was a warm little fuzzy b moment for sure.

under my umbrella

6.03.2007
don't cha just love that dang song umbrella?! i can't get enough!




hey hey hey people! how were your weekends? good i hope. mine was so wonderful...there were some weird bumpy points but i swear the good stuff just kept toppling all the crummy stuff.



first the shoot. so i FINALLY got to meet a bud of mine that i've been playing email swap with for quite awhile now. she's pretty frickin' dope and she's damn good at her job. i got mad respect for intelligent gals rockin' out their lives to the fullest...no wonder her and e are such good pals. luv ya'll! so yeah i get to the shoot and i get in hair and makeup and i swear my altar ego came out and i just came alive...i haven't felt that great in a really long time. the last time i did anything in the modeling world was my sophmore year of college...it's just fun ya'll. all your insecurities fade away...maybe due to the pound of makeup that's caked on your face...nonetheless, a new persona was born. i loved it!



the great part about the whole frickin day though was knowing that after this incredible shoot i'd be meeting up with my girl b and heading to vegas on a great road trip. i didn't finish the shoot until 8 something so we grabbed our starbucks, packed up our stuff (and my scrabble game...i tried ya'll!!!) and headed out. i love our car chats. we gabbed and gabbed, she let me take a short nap (thank you for that my friend!) and then we were in vegas at 1:00 a.m....checked into our suite long enough to throw on our clubbin' clothes and then headed to the place to meet up with her younger sis. it was jenn's 21st b-day...you know we had to do it up hardcore! i've danced a heck of a lot and hurt now quite a bit : )



we layed by the pool, drank mojitoes, chatted it up, napped for a couple hours (this is where scrabble should have happened by the way) but the best part of the day was when b asked me to fill how big her boobs were getting so of course she grabs my hand and makes me...and OF COURSE the cleaning lady walks out and sees us...b's shocked face, my hand (that's still there) she just went back in hurriedly and shut the door...nice b....NICE!



we ate some good grub and then went to tao (my fav spot) which started out really bogus. it was crowded as heck and the music was goofy but then we found a little spot all to ourselves...that happened to be right next to wayne brady and his posse (the waves still have me sea sick b!!!) and we got our little groove on. this cute guy came over later and became our friend...he had b, jennifer and i doing shots of tequila and totally made the night a blast. i've never met cool peeps in vegas. first time for everything...who knows.



we got back from the club at 5:30 in the morning...slept for 4 hours and then got up and headed back to la...we're soldiers i say! all in all it was a really fun weekend with my girls. life's swell. now back to the grind..going to bed early tonight for sure!!!

A something for someone’s nothing

6.01.2007
I saw bug last night and it seriously had my skin crawling (sorry for the ridiculous puns but I couldn't resist) in all seriousness though it was highly disturbing and for a late Thursday night "lets go to the movies" thang I totally wasn't prepared. It definitely had 'romantic' tendencies but there was definitely no fluff in this film (alliteration!)






Althought I totally bagged on it last night to Kenny I'm starting to appreciate it the more I think about it. I still wouldn't see it again but I will say there was some superb acting and the premise was freaking unique as heck…definitely haven't seen anything remotely like it EVER. Lol.





Warning: I'm about to discuss feminist issues and the movie in detail so if either are a buzz killer for ya stop reading here.





The aspect that interested me keeps looping in my head…there's this woman and she meets this guy…the director patiently spends a good portion of the beginning knocking you over the head with the fact that she's lonely and sad and then she meets this guy that brings a something to her nothing and it goes downhill from there. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to apply this same theory to desperate relationships around the world and the obvious lessons that come from their demise. This man sees her vulnerability…her willingness to join another's world just to get out of her own and soars with it. He takes her down the most BIZARRE path…it's disturbing on so many levels people, but Ashley Judd's subtle fall down the rabbit hole is crazy to watch. You seriously are shockingly smacked with the fact that this man is pulling her way down…for a good portion of the movie you're right along side this guy…maybe even pulling for him. (Just like a good friend to try to support a girl that finally looks happy.) -wink-





It definitely gave me more than I assume Pirates would have been able to. Maybe I'm getting old but three hours just sitting? Are you kidding me?! I'm really trying to delay that whole pee pee dance if I can.





Anywho. Today is photo shoot day and I get to dress up and rock it out (I suddenly have 'walk it out' in my head) so I'm uber excited. I don't even mind the fact that I woke up at 5 to grab some extra hours at work. Today is gonna be such a good freaking Friday! I love that!!!





Hopefully work will agree with me…





It's times like this that I'm glad I'm single and young and free to do whatever the heck I want to : ) life's grand.
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