i’ll be (fill in the blank)

so i decided to take a walk after i worked out so that i could see the sun set. i walked a couple of blocks in my neighborhood, admiring the surroundings i've finally learned to call my own and bumped into a cute little old lady.

she asked if she could join me for a block or two--that she needed to stretch her cute little spry legs, i said of course and we were off. she had no problem chatting or asking me questions about why i was walking, what i do for a living, etc. it was all cute and fun but then she asked me what i believe my purpose to be and i fell in love with the little old lady. ya'll didn't know just how much i love to talk about my dreams do you? no...of course you don't. : )

did any of this really happen? no it didn't but it sounded cute didn't it? profound even? hee hee....sorry couldn't resist. i had a great work out--my abs are throbbing--always a good sign and now i'm reading in bed and it makes me happy. when i'm happy i day dream--hence the birth of the little old lady story.

there is a point to all this though. i wouldn't just play blog like that...

the little day dream combined with this book i'm reading got me thinking...what role do you really play in life? i honestly believe i am an actress and day dreaming aficionado playing the role of a gal working a boring job in corporate america. thinking this way puts me at a peace and explains oh so much...it's why i can't get the hang of work stress, work annoyances, work anything. i'm a fish out of water--a girl playing a girl. maybe somewhat miserably lol...but believe it or not i'm ok most of the time--some people there are still fooled.

so i wonder who else is playing a role? who's really trying to be something completely different...professionally, personally, whatever?

it's interesting. i do know one thing though. coming up with a new perspective on acting is swell.

"are you taking any acting classes tish?"

"why yes i am. it's the acting class called 'this is my life right now and i have to work like kunta until my dream becomes real' ever heard of it? it's the best practice ever and it's going to prepare me like no other to be the bestest actor there ever was!"

"wow tish you rock! i'm going to put you in my next film! can you quit your job and start tomorrow?!"

"why yes steven. i can."

i wonder how long i can function off the role mentality. i have a feeling i'll sometimes be quite sad that i can't break character. for now it's cool though.

alright. promise that's the last blog for tonight. it's getting cooler in los angeles. i have my windows open for the first time in months. cars are whirring by, the air creeping in is niiiiice. i love the fall. new season, new weather, new perspectives, new attitudes...new new new.


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