i am really crackin up right now at how hard it truly is to be an optimistic positive person. the minute i take a time out and say "rain cloud, please stop following me around. i'm kinda not feelin' the wet cold and dreery thing anymore" the rain cloud laughs in my face and pees on me harder.
exhibit a: i am all set for my fabulous slumber party (cheap) weekend...my girl b and i are giddy and goofy....cruisin to our little chicken spot to pick up some grub. i go to open my damn car door and klurplunk. the handle lifts up but nothing door-movement wise happens. sigh....my door broke. my damn door broke.
yes, i tripped out. the rain cloud came back in full force. i've named him eyore he's so frickin' prevalent in my life. sigh...my true hollywood story is gonna be so good ya'll cuz i seriously am too broke to get that crap fixed. you learn how to prioritize and appreciate what you do have real quick. so i have to crawl in thru the passenger side. no big deal...at least it still runs and i have kick arse a.c. (knock on some damn wood!!!) but trust you me. i ain't going ANYWHERE until that ish is fixed. IN-COG-NEGRO
i seriously do not enjoy swimming in disdain. i do avoid many a funk. there are just so many marbles that can sit on that darn paper towl before they all break and unleash the crazy.
i started reading this book last night, broke diaries, and i didn't know whether i should laugh or cry...be shocked or empathize lol cuz that SAME ISH is what i'm going thru. read it. she does a way better job at making that stuff sound funny and witty. trust.
of course it builds character...weeds out the mentally weak from the strong ya ya...blah blah. i know plenty of great swell people that never had to say the following:
"bills this month, peanut butter's protein you can live off that this week"
"they say you can survive so and so many days without dying....just drink water"
and those people are just fine... i'm thinking of a poem by amiri baraka right now called "dope". google that ish and get back to me.
for now i'm gonna continue to roll my eyes secretly at all the pollyanna's out there telling me the sun is gonna shine tomorrow and day dream about rubbin peanut butter all over their lovely sweet faces. i'm being positive...i'm workin' with what i got. : )
i have to rub peanut butter on my own dang self first though cuz even as i sit here and write this ode to eyore i still believe that something good's gotta break thru...a little jelly to cut the pb. i'm crossin my fingers so hard i'm gettin arthritis. my ppo will cover that though so i'm not worried ; )