hot water

there's this saying that spreads around the internet from time to time about people being like tea never find out how strong they are until they're put in hot water. i'm being tested like a mutha on that little idea right about now.

i'm really trying to pay off my debt, keep up on my bills and do all that jazz, but it's hard so yesterday i went and applied for a second job at good ole barnes and nobles near my place. this action came with a reality check though....job number two means even less time to focus on acting. it's a hard realization when you find out the thing you want most in life gets in the way of basic practical living. i was talking to my mom about it all last night and i just choked up...couldn't even talk anymore. part of all the drama was the fact that i've been getting whack sleep lately, but it still sucked. i felt like a little dark cloud was following me around all day. i was waiting for someone to throw something at me like they do to charlie brown...little woodstocks flittering above my head...but instead i just went to bed. i know all of this will pass and i'll have good times a plenty, but life's rough ya'll. i'm talking to someone about possibly getting back into modeling so hopefully something can come of makes me feel better to take action...i'm putting myself on an extreme budget...tishy ain't going NO WHERE anytime soon (well except for my wedding in texas next week-hee hee) i no longer can be complicit in my own that? it's not mine, but i write it on all of my journals as a reminder. catchy, right?

tonight i watch ugly betty and grey's anatomy...two shows capable of putting me in the most excellent of moods. plus my goyles are joining me. it's all good in my hood. sleep and friends can cure any bad checkbook.


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