new years 06

1.02.2006 it really here? Is it really '06? I went up to Sacramento for the big night and we ended up at this club that had a wack DJ that informed us kinda late that it was "06 up in this bitch" countdown this year for me. I want to pull something positive and beautiful out of that, but I'm having troubles lol...maybe it will symbolize the changes to come that I shouldn't plan for or count down to...maybe I should just enjoy my current moments...current moment one enjoyed, current moment two enjoyed...

I spent a lot of the weekend reflecting on all the who haa I went through in 2005. There are some things in my life that I keep repeating like a broken record...that ish has to stop. For the first time my boy made me cry and I really don't think I would have even been aware of what made me cry if it weren't for my friends telling me their thoughts and feelings on the matter. I don't know if ignorance is bliss in this case, but I really didn't want to cry on a plane over someone that I consider to be one of my good friends out here. When do you listen to friend's suspicions (cuz you know your girls can see what you can't) and when do you trust that you have a good matter how slow it may be? I dunno folks. As I say in my journal quite a bit "we'll see".

As for now I'm chillin. It's the end of my holiday season, it's cold, I'm lacking a computer (currently upstairs on my roomies) so the odds of me getting cheery are pretty slim. I'm going to go downstairs and listen to some good music to put me in a little better mood. I did have one great moment...I was on the plane looking out and I imagined myself as an actress...flying to whatever destination it was to take me to my first acting gig on site...that was a good feeling...visualizing is half the battle, right? :)

happy new year everybody!!!! "it's time to fix in the 06"!!!


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